Courtney's Cauldron

The other day I had the hiccups. A lot. I’m talking in dang near every single one of my classes, after school, in the shower, while I was sleeping, etc. And they were loud. And violent. People seriously stopped in the hallway to stare at me because of my hiccups.

Of course, when somebody has hiccups, people stop to give them advice. Over the course of the day I got tons of different suggestions on getting rid of my hiccups, and I realized that the ways to get rid of hiccups got more and more exotic and ridiculous as the day went on:

Hold your breath for two minutes.
Drink water until you stop hiccuping.
Jump up and down on one foot while holding your breath.
Look up and swallow.
Look down and swallow.
Drink water from the opposite side of the glass.
Put an ice cube on the back of your neck.
Hold your breath for five minutes.
Cross your eyes and breath only out of your nose.
Look at the sun.
Think of a Beethoven song.
Hold your breath for ten minutes.
Spin in circles.
Pet a dog.
Drink soda.
Hold your tongue in your fingers.
Hold your breath for two hours, fifty seven minutes, and twelve seconds.

Okay, I’m only over exaggerating a little. I was seriously told to put an ice cube on the back of my neck and to hold my breath and do various forms of jumping jacks or to drink several different drinks. A girl actually told me that every time she gets the hiccups she pets a dog and they go away and my choir teacher told me (sarcastically, I think) to think of a Beethoven song. Then to play it backwards in my head.

By the end of the day I had a theory: If I spun counter clockwise in six circles while holding my breath and drinking hot green mint tea while holding a dog, then stopping to clap four times, then spinning clockwise three times (while holding my breath) and stopping at a 78º angle from the ground, my

Don’t you just love it when the district decides to cancel school?

Maybe not, if you aren’t in school. Or aren’t in a place that has snow. Or if you actually enjoy going to school. Then I suppose you probably wouldn’t be too fond of the district’s tendency to shut down when the weather gets bad…

But since I do attend school in a place where it snows and I prefer to sleep in I LOVE SNOW DAYS!

And although this post may seem a little random, it’s not– because WE HAD A SNOW DAY TODAY!

The only downside was that I still had to go to my orthodontist appointment and get my teeth tightened and screwed and glued and whatever the heck else they do to me there.

~Courtney

Today, my math class seemed to last about 2 billion hours, which is nothing new, but yesterday it flew by in about 5 minutes.

Granted, today we were taking notes about the worlds most boring and useless formulas while yesterday we were taking a semi-important quiz.

Which brings up the question of why our brains work that way. I mean obviously my math class isn’t in some sort of anomalous area that warps the time-space continuum or something (though that would explain a lot) so why is it that it is the longest part of my day? All my other classes are the same amount of time, and we actually do more in my English and Chinese classes than we do in math– yet that’s the class that never ends.

I suppose at this point I should probably refer to the quote “time flies when you’re having fun” but it’s not like my Econ class is fun either. Though I suppose the reverse is also true. There should be some sort of quote for the opposite effect, like “time drags it’s feet in the dirt when you are miserable” or even just something pertaining solely to math: “the time flow in math class will always screw you over.” That would work just fine.

~Courtney